# How many of you? (For the committed and married ones)



## eternity302 (Apr 22, 2010)

Okay.. I thought I ask this question after tonight!
So what happen is my common law partner / wifey is working till at least 1AM tonight, so I went to buy some plants before I got off work cuz it's in the same mall! HAHA!! Cuz I know she wouldn't let me buy more plants, she rather I grow it all, and trim and trim for months!
So i brought the plants home tonight, planted it all, and she wouldn't be able to do much when she notices it in the morning!! HAHA =) How many of you do that? Like buy livestock/plants/equipment and tell them there's basically no more way of refunding?


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## target (Apr 21, 2010)

I pretty much tell her when I am going to get something. She is cool with it, knows it's my hobby. Occasionally I will bring something home or swear I 'told' her about it but it's all good.


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## eternity302 (Apr 22, 2010)

wow!!
She thinks I over spend =)
Maybe cuz I already have two sports bike I spend on~
Usually it's good for me... but sometimes.. I just rather not say HAHA~


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## SeaHorse_Fanatic (Apr 22, 2010)

There are some decisions in terms of livestock that Irene has a say in (ie. Wanted Porcupine puffer, Copperband Butterfly, certain types of corals & No venomous fish & no "snake-like" eels)

Otherwise, I don't really "consult" her with my purchases. She trusts that I won't get too crazy or allow myself to get ripped off, so as long as its not going to require another tank to be set up, she's okay with it.

Now, I sometimes buy stuff because Felicia (my LFS visiting buddy) likes it and tells me "Daddy, buy".

Anthony


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## Adz1 (Apr 21, 2010)

i keep all livestock purchases under my hat till the wife notices them in the tanks.
she gets very angry when i bring home new fish.
supplies is no problem i just tell her what the fish need and she says go get it.
she understands it is my hobby but knows I'll spend every dime if left go unchecked.


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## MananaP (Apr 22, 2010)

I just buy and tell the other half after i have already purchased the item i wanted(most of the time) LOL....


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## dean9922 (Apr 21, 2010)

I tell my wife also, sometimes not right away, but usually pretty quick. Knows it's my hobby and passion, so she's pretty cool with it all....just a lot easier that way and no lies.....besides I never get mad when she buys her wine, new clothes or $120 trips to the beauty salon....lol


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## budahrox (Apr 21, 2010)

Open & honest = 30 yrs so far!!! 
Best way to keep your best friend, your best friend!!! lol 
Take your lumps when you earn them, she'll respect you a lot more for that. 
Cheers!!!!


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## 2wheelsx2 (Apr 21, 2010)

If you have to hide it, eventually it'll catch up to you. It's better to have that discussion early on and explain how and why you do things. It's just too much work to spin the lies, plus it's no way to maintain a relationship.


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## Aquaman (Apr 21, 2010)

Never have a problem telling my better half.....she knows its a addiction kinda like her mento's are 
She may roll her eyes from time to time and stand in the middle of the room evil eyeing all the fish tank paraphernalia  ( sometimes its EVERYWHERE )
Right now I am in the middle of setting up a 180 double stacker in the frontroom and she's kinda okay with that . But the mess and clutter thats EVERTWHERE is her biggest pet peeve. 
Once its all set up and the mess gone she will be as happy as a clam 
Altough I would hesitate bringing home another tank....in the near future .
bill


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## davefrombc (Apr 21, 2010)

Ummm..... Is that a "steamed" clam Bill?


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## MadgicBug (Apr 22, 2010)

Its a little bit opposite for as my wife encourages me to get it and I have to be the voice of reason and talk myself out of it. 

She does get realy ticked off for me buying a fish or supplies and not like it or not use it after a few weeks.....so hence the voice of reason.


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## Trouble (Apr 27, 2010)

*They will find out anyways, so why bother. Too much. i have enough stress in my life. If he can buy Jerseys's and stuff for himself, so can I.*


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## eternity302 (Apr 22, 2010)

=) I usually go with my partner to buy stuff... but once I get too much or already have too much... i get held back... LOL! Therefore... buy it with a no refund stamp on it =)


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## onefishtwofish (Apr 21, 2010)

hahahah...same place this old dress or this old $300 purse comes from....had it for ages....guess you just never noticed it!

she should just be lucky you dont have a pick up truck...then you'd have a spare tank collection like no one else has....


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## JTang (Apr 21, 2010)

I never have this problem... since my wife spends 10 times more than I do! In fact she always encourage me to buy more even though she has absolutely no interest in them! LOL


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## onefishtwofish (Apr 21, 2010)

JTang said:


> I never have this problem... since my wife spends 10 times more than I do! In fact she always encourage me to buy more even though she has absolutely no interest in them! LOL


a clever ploy...smart girl!


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## 2wheelsx2 (Apr 21, 2010)

JTang said:


> I never have this problem... since my wife spends 10 times more than I do! In fact she always encourage me to buy more even though she has absolutely no interest in them! LOL


Actually, you do have this problem, but it's just in reverse!


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## jkcichlid (Apr 21, 2010)

I figure you may as well tell her as she will figure it out anyway and there are no hard feelings.


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## flannel (Apr 21, 2010)

If it's smaller, everyday things, hubby and I just have this unspoken agreement that we just get what we want. We discuss bigger purchases. We pay the important bills and trust each other to do our agreed upon parts, then the rest is left for fun. And we're honest about what we buy. But then, we both have pretty good self-control and don't make foolish purchases. He doesn't harass me about my hobbies (fish, gardening, photography, collecting craft supplies *snerk*) and I don't harass him about his hobby (self-funding his efforts to run in nearly every election available). So, I'd say, no, don't hide anything but make sure you're being reasonable when you make a purchase.


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## thefishwife (Apr 21, 2010)

I am with Don - Open + Honest! My hubby is supportive of my hobby and if I need anything he is OK with me getting it. I have never felt I need to hide it.


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## CRS Fan (Apr 21, 2010)

For me I will sometimes minimize the cost or if I can sneak it into a tank every now and then, I will. I guess since she got into bettas (had nothing to do with me  LOL), she has become more accepting of my hobby. She still does not like the water changing part because our kitchen is connected to our living room ! I also think since I cleared my fish stuff out of the back room, she now has a dedicated 'art room' ! It is a balancing act at the best of times.

Stuart


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## Morainy (Apr 21, 2010)

Oh, I pretty much smuggle everything in but it's all part of the fun. If I get caught, he just laughs. 

The problem isn't so much hiding the expense, it's hiding the time it takes to look after them. I think I spend about 12 hours a week hauling water to my 7 small tanks. I try to sneak that in late at night or very early in the morning. Probably in the summer or next year, I will switch to just one big tank and one betta tank.... Or maybe to one big tank, one biggish bowfront, and one betta...

;-)


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## rescuepenguin (Apr 21, 2010)

Anything I post here will come back and bite me as both my wife and her best friend read all new posts. We pretty much work together on things and try to plan it out. She has her area(s) of interest and I have mine. Every now and then she sneaks in a fish (usually a betta) and then when it comes to feeding time I say "well hello there, where did you come from". When I ask my wife about it I hear the same 4 words every time "I love you honey".

Steve


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## Punkys Dad (Apr 25, 2010)

She owns half my kingdom already, and so far she hasn't told me which side of the 80 gal I own yet.


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## Bok (Apr 22, 2010)

I sometimes have to hide plants, because she'll be likely to pick through them and take the nicest for her Ryukin fantails  

Fish, I HAVE to be careful, she wants to keep everything that comes through the door!!


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## Sargasso (Apr 21, 2010)

I never sneak anything...but I'm definitely guilty of "giving" fish as gifts


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## eternity302 (Apr 22, 2010)

rescuepenguin said:


> Anything I post here will come back and bite me as both my wife and her best friend read all new posts. We pretty much work together on things and try to plan it out. She has her area(s) of interest and I have mine. Every now and then she sneaks in a fish (usually a betta) and then when it comes to feeding time I say "well hello there, where did you come from". When I ask my wife about it I hear the same 4 words every time "I love you honey".
> 
> Steve


HAHAHA!!! That is hilarious! You made it sound like you expect mysterious fish to show up during feeding time!!


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## eternity302 (Apr 22, 2010)

Punkys Dad said:


> She owns half my kingdom already, and so far she hasn't told me which side of the 80 gal I own yet.


LOL! Same here...
The guppy tank.. we wanted to do a java moss floor through mesh screen... she did half of it, and told me to do my own half...  my half haven't grown one bit, but her half is thriving... sigh...


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